Rule #4 Real women find real men.

I guess the hardest thing about that is figuring out what a real woman is. Deep down I believe all us girls know that it takes a spot of classy mixed with gentleness and purity, but one thing we may not all grasp is the self-worth portion. I believe that our self-worth is defined by what we believe we deserve in a man. If you think that your standards need to be lowered because there is no "good guy" out there, think again. I would dare to say that IT IS OUR STANDARDS THAT DETERMINE MEN'S ABILITY TO LIVE UP TO THEM! If you expect your boyfriend to be a cheapskate, looser, liar, or anything less than a powerful man of God...than that's what he will be. Not only do we attract the men that we expect, but if we don't "lay down the law" so-to-speak, than how will they know there is something to live up to?! A real women knows how to gently speak her mind on what is acceptable and a real man would give anything to be the hero you want. If that man has an excuse for being anything less-than, move on! The longer you stay and put up with it, the more you add to this man's idea of what is considered okay, AND the longer he goes without change! The greatest thing that we can hope for is that all women pull together on this. If all women knew their worth and expected it, than no man would be able to get away with mistreating any of them. Get it together girls!

Rule #3 IT'S NOT A GAME

Most girls accuse guys of being the game players, but here's one we girls have that is JUST as bad. The difference is it's not just harmful to the guy, it's harmful to the girl too! This game has no name because it has been adapted into what's thought to be "normal" for way too long. The way it works is this: girl meets guy, girl tells friends about every physical and verbal interaction with guy, girl looks for input from friends and judges guy's legitimacy accordingly. The guy is then subject to what could be months of judgment, just because girl isn't awake enough to see the relationship for what it really is. Here's what it really is: If you have to ask someone if your man is doing right, than he is doing WRONG! When a guy is REALLY into you he makes it clear. There are no mixed signals. If an excuse can be made for his lack of commitment, verbal-affection, attention ...you name it; than it's because you are NOT the girl for him and he's getting something other than eternity with you out of it. You now have two choices: Run and Run fast. Or agree to wasting your time, heart, and physical purity and worth on him until he decides to stop calling, (stop calling for good this time). And for all you tough girls out there who believe you don't need commitment, well take it from me, you deserve it and it is WELL WORTH the wait! Don't waist his time and don't waist yours with "the game."

Rule #2 GUYS ARE LIKE GRITS...

Cigarettes, that is. Especially if you live in a culture where cigarettes are completely normal, and they won't kill you, but potentially they may cause something that will! Yes, guys can be good and potentially cause even what may be God's plan for you. However, if you are like I was in my single years; It wasn't about God's purpose, it was about my void of loneliness. After developing the addiction to the attention, it becomes second nature. You no longer realize that you are acting out of an adapted and learned-behavior. Even when I began to date my husband, my reactions to male-attention was too strong. I would blame myself for being lustful or wonder if I'd made the wrong decision in who I was with. The truth is I wasn't aware that my reaction WAS NOT natural, rather learned. If you're single this carry's the same weight. If this has become normal to you as well, then look at men like your addiction, or your weakness. They are not something special, just TEMPTATION! Simple, and as old as sin; temptation, (which truly has no power over us if we know God). Once God showed my this, a weight was instantly lifted off my shoulders. I can be confident now when someone acts out of line (since I'm married, the flirting is out of line) that it's not me, and it's not really them, it's just "grits".

Rule #1 INTEREST DOES NOT MEAN POTENTIAL

If you've grown accustom to being overcome with immense joy on the somewhat rare occasion someone asks you out, do you know why? Hopefully it's not because you are so blind to your own worth that you crave the attention from someone else. Hopefully, It's not because the guy who just asked you out is SO hot - except you know nothing else about him, like his possible lying/cheating/stealing/whoknows past. Hopefully, It's not because you're inborn want for a spouse is not yet balanced with your well-learned want for the "right" man. And Hopefully, you are not so overcome with excitement that you go from "omg he's hot, to what color tux-shirt combo should he wear in our wedding, to what would our children look like" in one split second. Hopefully you know that his attention, no matter how pleasing, does not mean that you need to attach your heart to him and day dreaming that he'll call. Remember how you felt before he asked you out or showed you attention. If you weren't REALLY that interested, than why are you now? Just because he thinks you're the one does not mean that he ***HAS TO*** be your one. Don't let go of your priorities, WAIT to get happy until you find out, in time, that he meets the standards that you truly do deserve.